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What are some funny and smart quotes?

Last Updated: 26.06.2025 03:41

What are some funny and smart quotes?

“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”

They did a study between postal workers and chimpanze...

“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol kills brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”

Why are so many US conservatives in this day and age still against racial mixing? They won't say it in public, but they are still against the mixing between Blacks and whites? Why?

“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”

Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, Cheers.

“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”

Lipari Foods Issues Allergy Alert on Undeclared Milk in "Dark Chocolate Nonpareils" - fda.gov

“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”

“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”

“Ah just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they”re accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”

You're more likely to be struck by lightning than the Pacers were to win their playoff comebacks - NBC News

My sister Tracy sent me these a little while ago. I thought I’d share them. Thanks Trace.